Tuesday, March 27, 2012

From the Twitterverse...


 Here's a recap of some of LG's recent Tweets [which can be found @LazarusNYC on Twitter for those of you who indulge.]

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BREAKING: Superhero #GreenLantern has been defeated by a Coleman stove in battle of camping accessories.
Puuuulease! Oh no, a scary ring!


BREAKING: James Cameron admits journey to bottom of ocean was in search of Ron Paul's polling numbers.




 Least intimidating superhero? The Green Lantern. "Ooh it's a lantern, watch out he may spill kerosene on you!


I don't want to nit pick, but shouldn't Spiderman have eight legs?




I'm sure I could beat Superman in Scrabble but we'd have to play with lead-lined tiles or that bastard would cheat.
You can just see him trying to read his opponents tiles.


 Remember ladies, you can't spell "Pilates" without "Pie."
 

"Hunger Games" are what's experienced by people behind Rosie O'Donnell in the buffet line!


No shoes, no shirt, come right in ladies!
 

Anyone reading Tweets at this hour on a Saturday night is a loser. Anyone writing them, of course, is not.
 

Italian authorities have hired an expert in raising huge objects to right Costa Concordia: Rosie O'Donnell's personal trainer.


 Documentary on Joan River's comedy tour to be titled "Antiques Roadshow."
I wonder if Joan is in there?
 











I was shocked that the show "American Pickers" doesn't involve noses or fingers.


Brilliant Idea of the Day: Tell the world that #KONY has 10 of the new iPads, people will track him down quickly.


In China, college basketball has "The Long March Madness" and the "Sweet and Sour Sixteen."


I went to a BBQ at #LadyGaga's house and she threw her meat dress on the grill. She was wearing swordfish underwear. TMI?
NOT PETA approved....


"HUNGER GAMES:" I don't known much about it, but I'm guessing it stars Demi Moore and Calista Flockhart.












5 comments:

  1. Oh, Mr. LG....you were on quite a roll with these!! I have one more to add to your Hunger Games list: Angelina Jolie. Did you see her on the Oscars? Her thin little arms looked like bones with a tiny bit of skin on them. Ick!

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  2. In the words of Lady Gaga: you were born that way. Born to tweet.
    One liners are your specialty.
    My favorite was in regard to using lead lined tiles to play Scrabble with Superman. Genius. I'm totally going to whoop his superbutt next time.

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