Monday, November 11, 2013

European Vacation - Part 1 - London


LG and Mrs. LG went on a European vacation last month, covering five cities: London, Amsterdam, Heidelberg, Lucerne and Paris.  LG is going to post photos from each city in a multi-part pictorial on this venerable blog.  This first installment will focus on London.  That big Ferris wheel you see in the photo above is known as the "London Eye."  It's basically the same size as the Ferris wheel (I don't know why Blogger.com insists on capitalizing the word "Ferris" but it does) that you'd see down at the local Fireman's Fair in Asbury Park or Springfield or Decatur.  LG knows it doesn't look that way but it is, trust him bloke.  However, because it's located in a smaller country than the U.S. (that being England) it appears larger.  Just go with it.  And pay your 19 Euro ($25.46 in U.S. dollars) for a ride.


This is Mrs. LG on the plane over to Europe.  She's not a big fan of photos to be posted on the internet, as you may have guessed.  This move is also called a "moutza" in Greece.  Don't look it up if you don't know what it is.  She didn't mean it for you.    

This is a London taxi cab as seen from the rear passenger's seat.  These cabs are more spacious and, overall, better than NYC cabs by about 1.000%.  The drivers actually know where they're going.  But this particular cab only takes "cash." By "cash," he doesn't mean "cash money American," but still, it was a good ride. Notice that our luggage is enjoying the comfortable seating.



This is Big Ben. LG thinks that he may have been the first tourist to take a photo of Big Ben.  It's a rather large clock.  Rumor has it that the British government will soon be knocking down Big Ben and replacing it with a large smartphone that also tells the current time.  Just a rumour (as they spell it in Britain.) 



This is the American "Big Ben."  Doesn't look anything like his London counterpart, does he?  

This is the view out of Mr. and Mrs. LG's hotel room window in London.  The hotel was called St. Ermin's.  Who knew that there was a St. Ermin?  Not to be confused with that holy rat, St. Vermin.  That bloke walking in the courtyard had no idea that he'd be featured on an internationally famous blog.  There was a quaint little local coffee shop just around the corner named Starbucks. 

 

This was some official-looking bloke on a tricked-out horse carriage. We didn't know what was going on but it seemed like a good picture. It may have been a scene from the British version of "Duck Dynasty."  Sorry, we have no explanation.



This is the outside of the Lloyd's of London building.  LG has a number of friends who work here.  Some architectural critics say this building is ugly.  LG says that those critics should look in the mirror.


This is called "Tower Bridge." Some dumb American tourists think that this is the "London Bridge," but that bridge is in the Arizona desert. Tower Bridge is older than your oldest piece of clothing (including that favorite pair of sneakers you have way back in the closet.)  LG has nothing funny to say about this. 


This is Royal Fat Albert Hall, funded by a donation from Bill Cosby.  A lot of very famous musicians have played here, including Biggie Smalls and the Monkees.   
 

This is a photo that LG took from the front seat of the tour bus.  This girl, whose car was in front of LG's tour bus in London, vomited shortly after this picture was taken.  It was early on a Saturday morning. You can see her sort of leaning into the vomit now (perhaps she read Sheryl Sandberg's book "Lean In.")  Not really an ideal London tourist photo but LG posted it for you anyway.  You're welcome. 



As you can see, military officers in England need raincoats that fit better. This one is a little loose on the guy. Perhaps he recently lost a lot of weight in his hind quarters.



While we happened to be standing outside of Buckingham Palace, the English Royal Guard decided to re-enact the parade scene from "Animal House."  We assume that they did this because they knew that Americans were watching.  You gotta love those Brits, they are so accommodating to their tourist guests!  PS The Dean Wormer look-alike was spot-on.  


This is Buckingham Palace.  We caught Princess Kate running out in her nightie to get the morning paper (the New York Post.)  BUSTED Kate!


This is a new skyscraper in London called "The Shard."  It's tall.  Perhaps the tallest building in Europe.  LG scaled the outside of it and then BASE jumped off, but it was all in a day's work for an adventurer like LG.  Stay tuned for future posts about the rest of LG's and Mrs. LG's European Vacation 2013....


5 comments:

  1. Enjoyed my tour of London--thanks for inviting me to go with you. I've missed you, Laz!!

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  2. Great to hear from you and the misses! Your trip sounds like it was great, and of course your commentary is priceless!

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  3. A splendid, vivid & vibrant pictorial of small-town London — I salute you, Mate, with hearty "HUZZAHS"!

    Noitick, RI-not-Natick, MA

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  4. The photos are awesome! Thanks for sharing!

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  5. Top of the mornin to ya Guvnah! (said in my best Mary Poppins voice)

    The pics are fab. I can cross London off my bucket list because you already took me there with this post.

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The LG Report appreciates all comments, thanks for taking the time; Karma will probably award you a winning lotter ticket or something. The "or something" being more likely. But thanks again!