Sunday, November 27, 2011

Our Next Antique Photo...

First, LG would like to thank everyone who voted for his entry in USA Today's Cartoon Caption Contest for November.  Your kind support resulted in LG winning the contest (The prize: A copy of the cartoon autographed by the artist with LG's caption under it.)  LG very much appreciated your help!

Second, speaking of captions, here's the next installment in The LG Report's ongoing series of photos recently purchased at an antique store/thrift shop.

Some potential captions for this dandy snapshot:

1.  The world's first torso implant recipient poses with his older sister in 1948 while awaiting a torso from Canada.  (Editor's note: Canada always makes things funnier.)

2. This boy is pictured asking his sister, "Do my stomach and chest look non-existent in this outfit?

3. This little boy is thinking "With these ridiculous, over-sized pants, nobody will even realize that I'm wearing grandma's sweater!"

4.  A girl realizes early in life that her parents don't really like face.  All of her childhood photos look like this.

5. Pictured here is Waldo McGuillicuddy, inventor of the tricycle with the build-in fishing reel on the handlebars.  Unfortunately, Waldo died in a tragic 1952 fishing/cycling accident.  Folks, please don't fish and drive!

6. Young Danny DeVito, seen here, would eventually grow into these pants and wear them quite successfully in the film "Romancing the Stone."  

If you'd like to suggest your own caption, feel free to provide it in a comment to this post.  Or just provide a comment in a comment. Or just enjoy the post silently without commenting; it's totally up to you.

Finally, we leave you with some of LG's November Facebook status updates:

I knew I shouldn't have bought my GPS at the Dollar General. Yesterday it said "Stop being a typical man and just pull over and ask directions."

Getting a bit nervous. My GPS just said "Make a right at Washington Street and then lock your doors."

People are worried about 2012 because the Mayan calendar predicts the end of the world on December 21" 2012. Relax folks, the Mayans also predicted that Facebook would merge with Yahoo in 2009 and that "Barack Obana" (they misspelled his name) would be elected president in 2004. So they were obviously way off on their prognostications. Mellow out!

My wife said that I'm spending too much time on the internet. I said "LOL!" and then I "un-liked" her comment.

If I were at a class reunion and the guys from Steely Dan showed up, I'd say (quite loudly) "I thought you weren't going back to your old school!" That would show them. [Editor's Note: If you're unfamiliar with the song, you can here it by clicking HERE.]

Who anointed "sliced bread" as the greatest thing ever at one point in time? Regardless, I'm going to buy my wife sliced bread for her next birthday and when she complains I'll just say "Hey, it was the greatest thing ever at one time, it can't be all that bad now. Happy birthday!"

Thanks, as always, for stopping by folks, we hope to see you back again soon. 


  1. My vote goes to #6. That boy looks exactly like Danny DeVito--except for his face!

    That first GPS you mentioned--my husband has had it in his car ever since we got married.

  2. I also vote for #6.

    I LOVE the GPS quote!

    Hey - your wife should appreciate the bread. At least she'd get a gift. My husband would show me the empty bread wrapper and say - "Hon - we need some more bread."

  3. Number 6 wins my vote hands down. Sliced bread? Not sure that will earn you any Brownie points. Congrats on winning the captions contest. I knew my vote would count!

  4. PS--I voted 7,389 times--mostly for you. Did that help?

  5. Congrats on the win! I voted, too!

  6. i'd have to vote for #4. poor girl. and look at her socks!

  7. Congratulations on the win!

    That photo is awesome. I love old stuff.

    Your sliced bread comment has me cracking up.

  8. Leave it to you to come up with a totally hilarious spin to the antique photo collection idea!

  9. Hi LG. I'd like to try a caption for the photo.
    "I am too a girl! My hair just hasn't grown in yet! Don't you see my round collar and frilly sweater?"

  10. Thanks again everyone for your votes in the USA Today caption contest and your nice comments here, much appreciated! - LG :)

  11. You are a deserved winner. Congratulations and thank you for making me snort hot cocoa over my laptop today. I have heard of others doing it but this was my first time. I should know better than to drink and read here. Love your posts. Just been catching up on them.

  12. I am liking #1. I think the word "torso" makes everything funnier!

    Big hugs to you and Mrs. LG!

  13. Congrats on the win!

    I vote for #3.

    Mostly because, as a short Canadian, I take great exception to #1 - we should be keeping those torsos for transplants here.

  14. #4 made me laugh. If they chose to focus on ugly little brother in something involving a rather feminine collar, one can only imagine what the girl looked like *shudder*



The LG Report appreciates all comments, thanks for taking the time; Karma will probably award you a winning lotter ticket or something. The "or something" being more likely. But thanks again!